Monday, January 14, 2008

Math Quiz to Discourage Early Pregnancy

On the subject of teen pregnancy, an ounce of prevention is worth 8 pounds 2 ounces of cure. So, I'm posting a little quiz I call "Math to Discourage Early Pregnancy".

1. Poor Benny is sick. On Sunday he cried until 1:00 in the morning. How many hours can his mommy (or daddy) sleep before the alarm rings at 5:30 so s/he can take Benny to the babysitters’ house before s/he goes to work cleaning hotel rooms?

2. On Monday, Benny cried until Midnight then slept (off and on) until 5:00 am, Tuesday he was exhausted. He fell asleep at 9 pm, but woke up wet and hungry at 4:30 in the morning. On Wednesday, he was finally healthy again. He slept from 8:00 until 2 am, then went back to sleep from 2:30 until 5:30. Assuming Benny’s daddy and/or mommy slept every minute that Benny did, how many hours sleep did they get in 3 days?

3. On Thursday morning, Benny got carsick. To get the smell out of her car, Benny’s mom is going to rent a cleaning machine. It costs $8.50/hour, plus $9.85 for 1 liter bottle of cleaning fluid. If she can clean the entire car with only 2 bottles of cleaning fluid in 3 hours, how much will it cost, altogether?

4. It’s Saturday night and Benny’s mommy wants to go out with her friends. It costs $5 to get into “The Club,” plus a 2-drink minimum. It’s $2 for a “Club” soda (carbonated water). The babysitter charges $4/hour. Benny’s mommy has $40 left in her paycheck. She needs to save $12 for gas plus $10 for baby food, diapers and ramen noodles. How much does she have left?

5. If she has just 2 drinks, how long can Benny’s mommy go out?

6. Extra Credit. Suppose some $#@^%$%^*! puts a “rufie” in Benny’s mommy’s Club Soda, and she wakes up in a frat’ house on the other side of town. The bus fare is $1.00. She arrives home at 8:20? How much will the babysitter charge?

7. Extra Extra Credit. Compare the typical salary of an inexperienced high school graduate versus the cost of diapers, childcare, additional rent for a larger apartment (share rentals don’t accept babies), baby food, etc. Hint: This may be a negative number.

Thursday, August 23, 2007

Yahoo!'s Cover Feature

When I saw this, this morning, I had to giggle.

Aug 23, 2007

Tips to add 'curb

Experts and people on the street offer easy
ways to improve your home's landscaping

Yes, having a fit, attractive woman in our front yard --even if she weren't doing yardwork --WOULD make it more appealing from the curb.

My husband agrees and would like to know if she's available. He adds that neither price nor landscaping skills -- or lack thereof -- will be a concern.

Wednesday, August 15, 2007

Mom's Midlife Convertible

’Twas the middle of summer
When we ran to the yard
Yelling, “Hey look, Dad,
Mom’s got a car!”

It was as cute as a bulldog,
Just cozy for 4.
You could feel the gs (whee!)
When her foot hit the floor.

But when she drove us to school,
The neighbors would stare
‘Cause she did it topless
While drying her hair.

Nowadays she loves gas stations.
She just loves to pass ‘em.
One question, Dad,
What’s a car-gasm?

We heard her exclaim it
As she caught each green light
Singing, “I’ve got Mini Cooper! --
And a really great life!”

Monday, March 05, 2007

Next Live Highway Blog: a Crosses4peace Memorial

The Next Live Highway Blogging Event

will be a memorial to the fallen in the Middle East, both soldier and civilian, We'll host the event for commuters from 4:15 to 6:15 pm on Monday, 3/19/07, the 4th anniversary of the Iraq invasion.

Note new location: Event moved just one highway block to the intersection of Highways 29 & 221/Silverado Trail below "The Crusher" sculpture. To the north is Napa Valley, to the east is Lake Berryessa. Honest, if you're on Highway 29 near Napa after 4:15, you won't be able to miss us. PLEASE be careful. Turn around if you must, but please DON't cross the highway on foot.,+ca&layer=&ie=UTF8&z=13&ll=38.241551,-122.268734&spn=0.070918,0.186768&om=1

As we did last Friday, we'll plant white Crosses4Peace in the grass along the highway, we'll hold crosses, too, so they can't be missed. My black hearse-like suv will carry the banner and hold the flagpole. Our flag will fly at half-staff.

Blog about the last Live Highway Blogging event at w/ photos.

Live Highway Blogging combines 2 new 21st century ideas to improve upon an idea older than America itself – protest. Memorials similar to the Crosses of Lafayette are being erected all over the country, but they often encounter problems with local municipalities because of ordinances limiting signs or displays. Freeway bloggers, on the other hand, typically hang large banners from overpasses or billboards near freeways with fairly concise political messages like, "Impeach" or "We’re all wearing the blue dress now." This is usually a misdemeanor, and the signs are typically removed within 24 hours – fewer in Napa .

Summer Mondeau of explains, "From necessity and the first amendment came invention. By standing at the memorials with our signs, our crosses and our American flag at half staff on public property, we are a peaceable assembly petitioning our government for redress. That’s VERY legal." CHP has confirmed that the memorial event IS legal so long as the display is on a highway, not a freeway.

It was just another postcard evening w/ crystal CLEAR skies and full moon. As seen in the Vallejo Times-Herald (no link )and the Napa Register (great photo of veteran and peace activist, Mark Glickstein)
When the event ends, we'll put our Crosses4Peace back in our front yards.

Crosses of Lafayette video link (KTVU News channel 2 with Amber Lee)

Finally, the last banner asked "How many more?" I'm thinking for the next one, I should say

US: 3169 Iraqi: ?
Had enough?
call your Rep

What do you think?

Monday, February 12, 2007

Immigrants must adapt - a response

My mother knows a lot of people w/ a lot of opinions. She forwarded this to me with her comment, "Actually I think there is some truth in this. At first I thought it was pretty hard line, but as I kept reading I began to see their point. Thought you also might find it interesting."

I've trimmed it a little out of respect for your time. The news story is posted on, the entire commentary portion (explained in my response) is easily found by googling any key portion of the text.

Muslims who want to live under Islamic Sharia law were told on Wednesday to get out of Australia , as the government targeted radicals in a bid to head off potential terror attacks.
A day after a group of mainstream Muslim leaders pledged loyalty to Australia and her Queen at a special meeting with Prime Minister John Howard, he and his Ministers made it clear that extremists would face a crackdown. Treasurer Peter Costello, seen as heir apparent to Howard, hinted that some radical clerics could be asked to leave the country if they did not accept that Australia was a secular state, and its laws were made by parliament. "If those are not your values, if you want a country which has Sharia law or a theocratic state, then Australia< /st1:cou ntry-region> is not for you", he said on National Television.
Separately, Howard angered some Australian Muslims on Wednesday by saying he supported spy agencies monitoring the nation's mosques. (Not John Howard's)
Quote: "IMMIGRANTS, NOT AUSTRALIANS, MUST ADAPT. Take It Or Leave It. I am tired of this nation worrying about whether we are offending some individual or their culture. Since the terrorist attacks on Bali , we have experienced a surge in patriotism by the majority of Australians."
"However, the dust from the attacks had barely settled when the 'politically correct' crowd began complaining about the possibility that our patriotism was offending others. I am not against immigration, nor do I hold a grudge against anyone who is seeking a better life by coming to Australia ." "However, there are a few things that those who have recently come to our country, and apparently some born here, need to understand." "This idea of Australia being a multi-cultural community has served only to dilute our sovereignty and our national identity. And as Australians, we have our own cul ture, our own society, our own language and our own lifestyle."
"This culture has been developed over two centuries of struggles, trials and victories by millions of men and women who have sought freedom"
"We speak mainly ENGLISH, not Spanish, Lebanese, Arabic, Chinese, Japanese, Russian, or any other language. Therefore, if you wish to become part of our society .. Learn the language!"
"Most Australians believe in God. This is not some Christian, right wing, political push, but a fact, because Christian men and women, on Christian principles, founded this nation, and this is clearly documented. It is certainly appropriate to display it on the walls of our schools. If God offends you, then I suggest you consider another part of the world as your new home, because God is part of our culture."
"We will accept your beliefs, and will not question why. All we ask is that you accept ours, and live in harmony and peaceful enjoyment with us."
"If the Southern Cross offends you, or you don't like "A Fair Go", then you should seriously consider a move to another part of this planet. We are happy with our culture and have no desire to change, and we really don't care how you did things where you came from. By all means, keep your culture, but do not force it on others.
"This is OUR COUNTRY, OUR LAND, and OUR LIFESTYLE, and we will allow you every opportunity to enjoy all this. But once you are done complaining, whining, and griping about Our Flag, Our Pledge, Our Christian beliefs, or Our Way of Life, I highly encourage you take advantage of one other great Australian freedom,
"If you aren't happy here then LEAVE. We didn't force you to come here. You asked to be here. So accept the country YOU accepted."
Maybe if we circulate this amongst ourselves, American citizens will find the backbone to start speaking and voicing the same truths!

I felt compelled to respond,

You're right, there is SOME truth. But from "Quote: 'IMMIGRANTS, NOT AUSTRALIANS, MUST ADAPT'" it diverges from a news piece to a commentary of either American or Australian origina (sic) that was tacked on.

Few problems w/ the author's premises at least as they apply to the United States of America.

"This idea of Australia being a multi-cultural community has served only to dilute our sovereignty and our national identity. And as Australians, we have our own cul ture, our own society, our own language and our own lifestyle."

A multi-cultural community is a large PART of our national American identity, not a dilution of it. Remember the Great American Melting Pot? People bring their culture and SHARE it with us, making a more complex, flavorful stew (Salsa, curry, chop suey -- oh my!). If America's sovereignty is diluted --maybe it is -- I wouldn't blame immigrants, I'd look toward corporations, lobbyists and corrupt officials (e.g. Abramoff, Delay, Marianas Islands) who break up unions and fix elections in other nations keeping wages artificially low, shelter income in Cayman Island post office boxes so they don't pay taxes, offer scientists $10,000 each to cast doubt on global warming and consolidate the media so that a nation who watches only network news, at best, could be mislead into a war against its own interests. Let's not blame immigrants. It's the powerful screwing things up, not the powerless.

As far as "Christian principles, founded this nation, " that's another partial truth, to be kind. Yes, primarily (exclusively?) of English descent, many of the people who helped kill and steal the land from the natives here were Christians. (Do you honestly think they'd have welcomed a Buddhist of Chinese descent, for example, in the First Continental Congress? ) Nevertheless, many other founders were deists and Freemasons. This explains why, in part, why the most important right, -- to Christians and those few non-Christians who were free to participate -- the very first one in the Bill of Rights is "Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof;"

It seems to me, Americans are long on backbone, we're short on a most basic understanding of our real heritage. It's not an unburnable flag or even a common language (although it makes things smoother) that make our country great; it's those inalienable human rights that OUR government first acknowledged came from our Creator that are valuable, not some red, white and blue "culture". As long as we protect and defend those rights recognized by Our Constitution, America values will be okey-dokey. If you trash our liberties to preserve our "culture" you'll be left with neither

Friday, January 26, 2007

Putting it ON my chest

Thanks to the ironies of modern medicine, I have a pretty nice rack, to borrow my husband's phrase. Sure, what I spent on "the Wotowics" could feed and educate a third world family for a year or so, but dammit, as long as I was having the tummy tuck and the lipo, I might as well get my money's worth from the anethesia and the recuperation period.
No, I'm not trying to get a date. I have a political reason for making this disclosure, it's just another idea help you get your points noticed. (Yes, I know, I've gone too far)

Thanks to the ironies of modern medicine, I have a pretty nice rack, to borrow my husband's phrase. Sure, what I spent on "the Wotowics" could feed and educate a third world family for a year or so, but dammit, as long as I was having the tummy tuck and the lipo, I might as well get my money's worth from the anethesia and the recuperation period.

No, I'm not trying to get a date. I have a political reason for making this disclosure, it's just another idea help you get your points noticed. (Yes, I know, I've gone too far)

My niece is 14, so when she wears words on her pants, it's cute it a girlie sort of way. When 50-something Goldie Hawn sported "Juicy" on her backside, however, I kept thinking, "Maybe... but I doubt it and I really would rather not think about it." But that's another tangent. I'm getting around to this. If you're going to write somethin' on your backside (or frontside), make it count! Why spent a buttload of money on upscale euro-centric clothes to promote upscale euro-centric clothes, when you could sport a very fashionable anti-war message instead? Even the Gap gets that peace is cool and by implication, in contrast, war is stupid, which might be a good thing to express with your chiseled cheeks.

As in Freeway blogging ( and those little Sweetheart Valentine's Day candies (, the message must be extremely concise. Freeway blogs are good to copy, Convesation Hearts (like "Kiss Me", "Whiz Kid" or "Hot Mail", generally, are not. Similarly, I don't recommend sending your teens to school with the word "Peace" written across either their chest or tush. Given our national trend to suck at spelling, the message would probably be misunderstood.

Reminds me of the Happy Hippis who named their daughter Easy Flowing Essence. By the time she got to high school, they saw how short-sighted they'd been to nick-name her "Easy".

I just discovered t-shirt transfers I can make in my printer. I'm having oodles of fun! On election day, for example: I walked all over town with VOTE printed front and back in the largest letters I can find. But it's not just t-shirts and asses! In terms of getting creative with message placement, I even tried to sell advertising space on my bald head on e-bay. (post chemo -- another story June 2006). One woman used her pregnant belly to promote a casino, but it would have made a great space for a peace symbol, don't you think?
Y'all have such great ideas. What would you say and wear (pun intended) would you say it?

originally posted at Mon Dec 18, 2006 at 09:59:21 AM PST

Saturday, January 20, 2007

Why we'll always have war with "W" in Whitehouse.


The "people" running our government are war profiteers. They profit when they sell weapons of destruction, then they profit when they sell tools for reconstruction.

They will not "succeed" in the Middle East because "success" is not the goal -- at least not "success" as reasonably compassionate human beings define it. That would mean a place of sufficient peace and stability that people could live, move about safely and pursue happiness. Unfortunately, such a place isn't as profitable as the chaotic Hell they're creating in the "cradle of civilization."

Where'd I get such a crazy idea? Here. Notice it's written in April 2003 just a month after the US invasion of Iraq.

We hold these truths to be self-evident.... That all men* are endowed by their creator with certain inalienable rights. Peace is EVERY man's inalienable right. Insist on It!*Lest you think "men" does not include women, please see, for example, US Constitution, Preamble, "We the People..."(emp added).